Infidelity is something that no spouse is ever truly prepared to deal with, but unfortunately, infidelity is more common than most adults realize. Multiple studies have shown that approximately 41% of all marriages have at least one spouse who has admitted to cheating. Of the divorces that occur within the United States 15% state that infidelity played a role in their decision to dissolve their union. If you or someone close to you finds evidence that your spouse has cheated on you, knowing what to do if you discover infidelity can help you avoid making mistakes that are emotionally and financially expensive.
Do Not Focus on Finding Out the Reason
When cheating is uncovered, it is not unusual for a person to want to know what exactly led to the infidelity. Guilt or anger can lead to concerns that the catalyst for cheating was unhappiness in the marriage, dissatisfaction with intimacy within the relationship, or other problems that could theoretically be “fixed.” The uncomfortable truth is that over 50% of adults who cheat have admitted that they were perfectly happy with their marriage and partner but chose to have an affair anyway. Fixating on discovering an exact reason for infidelity does not always lead to the answers for which you are hoping.
Not confronting a cheating partner is one of the most difficult things for an adult to do. Hurt and a sense of betrayal can encourage you into a confrontation that ultimately causes more harm than good. Denial, blame, and other reactions may lead to you being hurt even more than you already are or make your partner feel as if his or her actions are justified. A confrontation could also lead to a physical altercation that leads to you or your children being harmed. The last thing you want or need is an arrest or domestic violence charge that could negatively affect your future efforts to obtain a divorce settlement or custody of mutual children.
Stay Off Social Media
Today it is natural for a person to take to social media when he or she has received any type of news, good or bad, that might be surprising. This habit could cause problems by publicizing your marital issue, alerting children who monitor your social media accounts, and give your spouse a chance to cover his or her tracks once he or she realizes what you know. Most importantly, stay off of your spouse’s social media accounts and refrain from checking his or her email or private messages beyond documenting information that you already discovered verifying your accusations. Snooping or violating the privacy of your spouse could be viewed unfavorably in the future.
Contact an Expert
If you have discovered proof of infidelity, or strongly believe it has occurred, contacting an expert is the best way to confirm your suspicions while protecting your legal rights. A family law attorney can help you gather evidence ethically and give you advice for how to proceed. The attorneys at Vayman & Teitelbaum understand how sensitive this situation is and are prepared to give you the legal advice and emotional support you need during this difficult time. Contact us today and schedule a consultation at one of our Atlanta metro area locations so that we can begin helping you explore your options.