Anger that arises from the divorce process can be overwhelming. Some people even discover that these negative emotions are so overwhelming that they end up saying or doing things that they never would have anticipated. While it is a healthy part of the healing process, anger also has the potential to overwhelm your life. For this reason, it is important to consider some helpful pieces of advice on how to cope with anger that arises from a divorce.
How to Handle Your Own Anger Following a Divorce
There are a number of ways to reduce the anger that many people commonly experience during a divorce. Some of the pieces of advice that it is helpful to follow include:
- Writing out your feelings so that you can release them in a healthy way.
- Developing a personal support system that you can use to talk out your anger rather than directing all of your anger at your former spouse. This might include a therapist or a good and trusted friend.
- Speaking with a professional who can help you avoid suppression of negative emotions. Many people discover that a therapist is able to help them move past emotional hurdles and continue happy and healthy into the future. Therapists can also help you understand what stimulus is most likely to upset you so that you can take steps to suppress it before it bothers you.
- Evaluating your fundamental beliefs and asking if your beliefs are true and whether they are holding you back from achieving your goals.
- Accepting any role that you might have played in the breakup of your marriage. In some situations, it might be helpful to reflect on what you could do to avoid these types of problems in future relationships.
- Avoiding making your children part of any conflicts that might still exist between you and your former spouse. This includes using children to relay messages between spouses or attempting to win the affections of children in an effort to make a former spouse jealous.
Ways to Reduce Anger Experienced by Former Spouses
If your former spouse is the one who is experiencing anger following a divorce, the following are some critical pieces of advice that you can follow:
- Listen and validate your former spouse’s feelings. In many cases, you might realize where the anger is coming from and be able to determine ways that you can help your former spouse cope.
- Walk away from a heated exchange if you are not able to calmly resolve things. This is always a better idea than ending up in a fight.
- Whenever possible, agree or sympathize with your former spouse. By practicing this pattern, you will be able to quickly handle volatile emotions.
- Understand that many comments made during this time by a former spouse come from a place of hurt. Rather than lashing back, however, it is better to be compassionate to the emotions that your spouse is feeling.
Speak with an Experienced Divorce Lawyer
If you are interested in divorcing your spouse or currently engaged in the process, you should not hesitate to speak with a knowledgeable divorce attorney. Contact Vayman & Teitelbaum P.C. to schedule an initial free consultation. Our lawyers have helped numerous people navigate the divorce process and will remain committed to making sure that matters are resolved in the best possible way.