Most people appreciate that the divorce process is a traumatic and challenging one. After all, divorce impacts nearly all important aspects of a person’s life including their commitment to their spouse, their assets, and their children. Regardless of whether you have been thinking about divorce for a long or short time, divorce does not formally begin until the appropriate paperwork is filed in court.
To make matters even more confusing, many people are given various pieces of advice during this time. While your loved ones and friends want you to get through the divorce process in the best way possible, not all advice is of the same weight. As a result, this article reviews some helpful steps to evaluate advice during divorce.
Separate Emotional Support From Advice
Emotional support plays a critical role during the divorce process. It is important, however, to separate emotional support from advice that you might receive from people who have good intentions but not the best qualifications. Many people discover that poor advice can make divorce even more challenging and lead to additional heartache. While there are many people who are not qualified to give you advice about how to navigate divorce, you should always listen to the recommendations of your attorney.
Why Poor Advice can be Damaging
There are several reasons to be cautious about listening to advice provided by friends and family members, but one of the primary reasons is that you might be provided with a false idea of how things will conclude. Expectations that we have about how an event will conclude can significantly end up shaping how we feel about something. Inaccurate evaluations of your divorce can form the backbone of unrealistic expectations.
An experienced family law attorney who has helped many other people with divorces can provide you with the most informed and realistic expectations about how matters will conclude. As a result, while there is certainly something valuable and comforting about being surrounded by your family and friends during this difficult time, you should let your attorney provide you with details about what to expect.
Examples of Bad Divorce
Acknowledging that bad divorce advice exists is one thing, but it is much more helpful to point out some of the most common pieces of poor advice that people receive. Some poor pieces of divorce include:
- Waiting to divorce your spouse until the children are out of the house. In reality, there is no research to show that this makes things easier for children. Sometimes, the best decision is to immediately divorce and place your children in a more peaceful and less combative environment.
- Tough love. Advice that you should just snap out of it or that you should “toughen up” are somewhat understandable. After all, no one wants to watch their loved one in pain. In actuality, being sad about the end of your marriage is perfectly understandable. The road to recovery will involve lots of complex emotions.
- You should quickly rebound. Anyone who tells you that you will be able to move past the pain of divorce by meeting someone new is incorrect. The only way to truly move past your divorce is to give yourself time to heal.
Speak With an Experienced Family Law Attorney
Divorce is difficult, but there are steps that you can take to make this process much easier. If you need the assistance of an experienced family law attorney, do not hesitate to contact Vayman & Teitelbaum P.C. today to schedule a free case evaluation.